Saturday, September 19, 2020
Home Beauty SELFCARE ISN’T SELFISH BY: MARCELITA FLOWERS

SELFCARE ISN’T SELFISH BY: MARCELITA FLOWERS

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Make time for yourself, YOU MATTER!

(photo of my three children after my third and last child was born, 2018)

When I decided not to go back to the work force after having my third child and be a stay at home mom, I thought it was the best decision for my family and me. I always wanted to spend more bonding time with my children after their birth, maternity leave isn’t long enough. I became a stay at home mom and I struggled to find balance between my studies, self-care, and taking care of home. Some days were blissful and other days I felt overwhelmed. Although, I felt assure of myself prior to becoming a stay at home mom, I found myself longing for self-discovery and wanting personal fulfillment outside of being a mother and wife. I was grateful to be in the position to bond with my children and build healthy relationships but staying home had its challenges. I’ve learned to pace myself and not set too high of an expectation for myself in balancing daily life. Often, I got caught up in being a caregiver that I neglected my own wants and needs. Through my experience as a mother I’ve learned the importance of self-care and how it can help rejuvenate your mind, body, and spirit. (early post-partum)

To kick off my first blog post I want to give you all a“highlight real, not reel” of  what life has been like as of lately.

In my indecisiveness, eight months post-partum I decided to go back to the work-force full-time to make my own coin. Although still grateful for the bonding time I had with my daughter I lacked social interaction with other adults besides my husband. I found myself feeling secluded from the world and experienced anxiety from only being a mom and wife. In 2018 my family and I relocated from DC to California and I didn’t know anyone (I’ll share the pros and cons of relocating at a later time). I even looked up local mom meet up groups, but decided that wasn’t my thing. Fast forward to the present and one year later from going back to the work force, I went part-time at my job to focus on my own self goals. That entails finishing my Bachelors in Psychology (I’m a junior finally, woohoo!), blogging, music, and entrepreneurship. My self-care journey is not about getting back to who I was before growing my family, but it’s evolving into who God has destined me to be. I’m pretty sure many of you can relate to what it feels like to desire to fulfill your own self-goals, but time may not have been on your side. Then there is the pressure of society that puts age limits on success which can be discouraging at times. Life happens and I believe even taking small steps towards reaching a personal goal is a win. Here’s to  figuring things out in your way and on your own timeline!

Here are some self-care tips for managing stress:

Time alone

Spending time alone is essential to your well-being. It’s time to reflect, relax, and release. Spend time pouring into yourself, doing something you enjoy, and nurturing your own self evolution.

Massage

A monthly massage can be rejuvenating for your body physically, emotionally, and mentally. It is a good way to reduce stress, release tension, and relieve pressure points in the body. And besides who doesn’t love a good rub down!

Meditation

Meditating daily enhances self-awareness, promotes emotional health, reduces anxiety, decrease high blood pressure, and helps with sleep.

Take a vacation

A change of scenery can be reviving in all aspects of your life. It’s good to get away from the routine of day to day responsibilities, relax and have fun exploring other places. Even if it’s a stay-cation, get a hotel for a few days and find something exciting to do for the first time. Plan ahead for a nice vacation because you deserve it!

Spa day
Take the day off and get a facial, pedicure or manicure. When you look good, you feel good. Pamper yourself!

Develop a hobby

Make time to learn a new skill and explore other interests you may have. You have nothing to lose but stress. Go for it!

Read a book

Reading can be a pleasant pastime. I recommend stepping out of your comfort zone and choose literature to read you’d normally wouldn’t. I have found it to be enlightening and enriching mentally.

Adequate sleep

If you’re a parent like I am then you know getting a full nights rest can be tough, LITerally! But, do your best to create a consistent sleep schedule, so your body can develop its own memory pattern. Adequate sleep of about 7 to 8 hours is imperative for your physical, mental, and emotional health.

Diet

Eat a healthy balanced diet and cleanse weekly. I’ve found that eating less carbs and mostly plant base meals has boosted my energy, provided good digestive health, and aids in weight loss. I recommend meeting with a nutritionist to help create a meal plan that suits your well-being. Health is wealth!

Exercise

Work out for at least thirty minutes a day, seven days a week. Fitness promotes good heart health, helps maintain a healthy BMI, improves physical strength, and overall relieves stress. And of course, always consult with your doctor before starting any exercise. Make it fun and switch it up!

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