ASK LADY A

My boyfriend has been cheating on me………

“My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and during those years he has been cheating on me, abused me physically and kicked me out on and off. I find myself going back to him all the time because I’m afraid of starting all over. What can I do to let that fear go so I can have the courage to walk away?”

D. Robinson

Dear D. Robinson,

The first thing is you have to know that you are worthy of life. Secondly you have to determine what support you need to conquer the fear whether spoken or unspoken and create that security around it and move accordingly. Third you have to make sure you address the issues of why abuse is okay for you. Starting over is never a bad thing because it allows you to live out the very moment or life you were intended to have from a healthy and healed standpoint. The fact that you have the courage to write your hurt says you are ready to address it and conquer your fear so kudos for your first step in courage. Last words for you are Seek out shelters or local groups that aid people of domestic violence and please tell someone you trust what is going on. Be safe and know you are not alone! I have listed the national Domestic Violence hotline for you 1-800-799-7233(SAFE)

 You Got This,

A. Johnson

“Lady A I have a male friend who is a great person. He is always willing to help people no matter what but at times I feel like he helps the wrong people, meaning women he is dating. He helps them with money and other items and to me they are using him. He says helping them increases his blessings to me they don’t deserve it. He won’t listen to me. How can I make him see that he does not have to do this?”

Dear  A. Johnson,

Let me say I have met many men like this in my day as well. Sounds to me like your friend may have the hero syndrome or he is just gullible. Because I don’t have more history on your friend like maybe how many relationships has he had in the past 3 years or if he is this way with every single one of the ladies it’s hard to say if he chooses the damsel in distress or if he shows signs of vulnerability and these women abuse it. What I can say to you as a friend is you have to be real careful with addressing his personal relationships. So I say the safe approach is to address him as the individual and ask your friend these two questions. 1. Does he feel less than if he is not helping these women? 2. What other forms can he help without it being equivalent to money or gifts? Access his answers and go from there. As his friend be honest with him and also be cautious of his feelings. Remember to respect his choices and support him from love.

You a Real Friend

 Lady A wants to hear from you and help you. Send your questions too askladya@luxekurves.com

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